It's October, which means Halloween is in progress at our house, but we didn't have any pumpkins! Time for another trip to Apple Annie's to pick our own. It's an hour and 20 minute drive from our house and the entire drive was filled with three year old chatter because Jack is physically unable to withstand the sound of silence. His fall back question while waiting for inspiration on the next topic is to ask "So! What we gonna do?" It did not matter how many times we told him we are going to pick apples and pumpkins and pumpkins and apples, he would inevitably come back to this question within the next 10 minutes. His mind races from topic to topic, and only half of it is recognizable to the rest of the world. Jordan and I could randomly pick up only bits and pieces from everything tripping off Jack's tongue and all of it either amazed, frightened or embarrassed us. There was one particular phrase that had us laughing and cringing at the same time. We didn't have a clue what the poor little guy was trying to tell us, but it sounded exactly like "f*@% a turtle". The more we tried to divert his attention from saying it, the more insistent he was in repeating it, increasing in volume and exasperation as the miles sped by. His sighs seemed to say "I cannot be more clear about how crystal clear I am being, and these fools still don't get it." We were able to change the subject only if we saw a school bus, a mater (which consists of anything construction related. He loves the movie Gnomeo and Juliet, and the machine that causes all the destruction at the end is called a Terrafirminator. Thus- maters), or a large animal, i.e horses, cows and goats. A few minutes after we finished singing a song related to the bus/mater/animal sighting we were back to the disturbing issue of turtles, which caused me to giggle into my purse while I pretended to look for something vital, and Jordan to turn up the radio while trying to convince himself that Jack was attempting to inform us about a flock of turtles. This led to a lengthy debate of what a large group of turtles are called, since herd seems too fast and school too fishy. We never came to a decision, but that wasn't why we were so willing to natter on about it. We were only concerned with talking over the sound of our son's voice. It was completely by accident that we learned a few hours into our day at Apple Annie's what he was truly saying. We were in the corn maze and Jordan spotted a tiny toad hopping through the corn stalks. He called for the boys to come look, and when Jack saw it he yelled in victory "F*@% a turtle!". You should have heard us (and I'm sure that everyone on the farm did) yell in return "Oh! A FROG and turtle!" Our new goal is to work on the letter R. And G.
Mitch ate more apples than we could keep track of today. Every time I looked at him he had a different one in his hand. I'd ask Jord, "Hey honey, did you give him the Roman Beauty?" "No. I gave him the Granny." "Okay, well I gave him the Golden Delicious so I have no idea where he got this one." And so it went throughout the afternoon. At one point he had a Roman Beauty and a Granny Smith, one in each hand and would alternate bites from left to right and back again. When we got home I called 1-2-3 NOT IT for diaper duty because I've been dreading the consequences of letting the baby loose in the apple orchard. When will we learn?
No comments:
Post a Comment