Help/ v. 1. provide (a person, etc.) with the means toward what is needed or sought. This is the word that Jack keeps using when he's following me around the house while I'm trying to clean. I don't think he's familiar with this definition however. What he is doing is closer to the definition of hinderance and Mitch is just plain endangerment. There I was, balanced on the top rung of the ladder, trying to clean the fans on our 12 foot ceilings. There Mitch was, lurking just out of sight, waiting until I was cleaning the bulbs to turn on the light. When I was blinded, he turned on the fan and ran away giggling when I screamed. Meanwhile, Jack was jumping on the bed and said "careful" in a bored, told-you-so tone of voice. So I went down the ladder with stars in my eyes to turn everything off and when I turned around Mitch was all the way up the ladder and getting ready to jump onto the bed 3 feet away. I guess I should be relieved that he's just an opportunist, and it's nothing personal. He's the guy that completely takes advantage of "wrong place, wrong time", and makes it work for him. Whenever I try to imagine his future I break out in a cold sweat and get shaky hands. If he doesn't end up in prison we'll be grateful.
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